Checklist Trek!

So many individual adventure episodes that deserve individual mention, for that 'one' day when I won't be lazy and purposeless in life 

DudhSagar Trek!

A childhhood dream conquered at 30 and something!

অবশেষে ভালোবেসে চলে যাবো

A shoulder

A hand

A handerchief

Vain

False

Wrong 

A nod

An agreement

A promise

Vain

False

Wrong

যদিদং হৃদয়ং তব তদিদং হৃদয়ং মম:

 Tarun lost his wife during the second wave. Right on his arms she breathed her last. No prior symptions, no extended suffering, the death happened sooner than we have ever read or heard about. The entire college gang gathered together at this news about their ideal college love story, the familes thought this would be the end of Tarun's sanity. They thought...

And then a year passed when all of Tarun's friends got an invitation from him; 

যদিদং হৃদয়ং তব তদিদং হৃদয়ং মম:

read the card cover.

Richa, who was scrolling over photos of Tarun's second marriage was still unsure of her reaction. On one hand she of course was very happy that her friend moved on, on the other hand she wondered if something so grave can be done away with, in a year. Was she being practical or romantic or maybe, hypocritical. Shyam, pulled Richa to his side, landed a kiss on her forehead and said 'You are my one and only, now stop overthinking', and Richa smiled. Ofcourse Shyam undertood Richa completely, of course she married right and she sighed in relief that maybe her husband would have taken a little more than a year to forget her. Again, does that make any point about anyone's love!? Who was she to decide?

Later that night, Sonia, tucked away in her 1bhk at Finland looked at her college best friend Tarun's new photos; Wow he moved on quite fast, she thought. She knew she wasn'st supposed to judge. Everyone deserves happiness. She looked her phone, love words like commanding, demanding, controlling, condescending were last shared by Yash, her one and only. But then, he also makes her cheese omellete on Sundays with dark coffee, he also makes sure to book the first SRK movies for her. Of course she would ignore those words by Yash and start tomorrow morning with a Good Morning text! Also, Tarun's life decision was his, who was she to decide?

But about judging?

Tarun

Richa

Shyam

Sonia

Yash

Me

We all can. We all would.

Farewell!

 To My Best Friend,

My fellow Coldplay listening partner, my fellow dreamer, my fellow hopeless lover!

At times you never know when it's the last time you're meeting a person, in their true self or spirit. We never realised ours as well.

And yet, everytime I hear yellow, I remember you. The days under the sun, the sheltered days at Munekolala, the impromptu plans on your Bullet and the many high spirits where I felt a lot of things, but mostly, I felt sheltered.

Fly high, sail away, as you must.

Forever your cheerleader,

Forever,

Will miss you, Imran.

Always Celebrate New Beginnings

 

Reverse Countdown to Bengaluru - 3 Days

 The breakdown

The meltdowns

Kolkata

I can't even

:(

ভ্রমণের শেষে ফিরে এসো তুমি আগের মতো কেউ বসে আছে তোমার অপেক্ষায়

 কেউ বসে আছে তোমার অপেক্ষায়!

Living and loving Kolkata has its own share of heartbreaks.

Especially if you had decided to leave the city too early and then the city never called you back.

So many of us, working so far off got our little paradise amidst the pandemic home office. 

But now, back to reality, back to base.

But the city waits,

Waits, but never calls back.

Never has, someday will?

কেউ বসে আছে তোমার অপেক্ষায়

10 Years Too Soon

 

Sizzle sizzle sizzle sizzle .... count to N!

Pink for Sizzles, Green for Normals,

Metal mugs for Bhalluks, Chakna for Free

Hello Peter Cat!

If I have to name one place in the world where standing in line for table doesn't irritate me, it is this!

My first Chelo in 2012!

And then a series of ritualistic chelos to celebrate milestones. 

However, blame it on the distance, the lack of vehicle, covid scare, new market temptation and Kolkata heat, I remember not visitig this place in the last 4 years until yesterday.

Collaged two photos taken 10years apart at the same table, with more than half of the table population which was exactly the same as what it was, 10years ago. Quicky touched wood while I realised that. Of course all of them find the place overrated. Bleh :P

As the day of leaving Kolkata, again, draws near, I get over nostalgic, of course. 

10 years too soon, too soon.

Be Well, My Lovelies

People we knew, and love(d).

Not the kind of love where you're in love with them. Just the kind where you love.

Maybe the teacher who taught you to love to write; the lady you never missed texting after a java failure because you believed their prayers had power; the friend who sent Bangla poems by his Granny on sms; the mentor who would keep The Voices suppliments' cut outs for your name; the friend you'd walk the last delayed 5mins to your home, from school with; the loves!

And all of them are there, somewhere in this universe, somewhere puttting up stories, just that you don't get to see them. Just that you don't get to know them. And probably now if you do, you won't recognise them too.

LepchaJagat!

We all know about the mighty Darjeeling, especially if you are a Bengali, you must have gone to Darjeeling at some summer or winter holidays, if not all!

Lepchajagat is a little hamlet, around 17km from Darjeeling which has never got its due credit, and maybe for good because there is still the old world charm of momos, tribal pork and a sense of happy trance here.

The best stay here is at the WB Govt forest bunglow which is tough to get, so, the 5-6 homestays available will do perfectly fine, as well!

Tall trees, constant fog, Hit from Sikkim, Shikhar from Nepal, these are Lepchajagat trademarks, and of course the warm people who will smile at you, wave at you, and you would know all of them in a day because they are a handful and distinctively happy high!

Neta Ji!

 Might not have the face to post, post Saturday 

But first stint at Netagiri, for the older me, soon, okay! -_+

Also, not so secretly, hoping to win too.

ভালো থেকো, ভালোবাসা

 

ভালো থেকো মন কেমন

ভালো থেকো হৃদয়

কখনো হেসে, কখনো ভালোবেসে

ভালো থেকো ‌রণজয় |

ভালো থেকো জীবনের তরী

ভালো থেকো ছোটবেলার গান

আহ্লাদে, সম্পূর্ণ বিশ্বাসে

ভালো থেকো মান অভিমান |

ভালো থেকো প্রথম বৃষ্টির আভাষ

ভালো থেকো আগমির আশা

এক পলক স্বপ্নে, প্রেমের যত্নে

ভালো থেকো, ভালোবাসা |

- অভিষিক্তা 

Gush of wind

Splash of water

Goodmorning pretty city!

Kollolini :)

 Ki Gorom!

Haa, London e jonmechhili toh!

Mine and Maa's standard conversation post landing to Kolkata for quite many years. I was so happy when she complained about the heat last week after coming to Kolkata from Bangalore. Next it was my turn today.

I worry extra about everything to look, feel and be extra correct at Kolkata for S. I act like a C grade Bollywood aunty presenting her child in front of a marriage prospect when it comes to Kolkata and S.

So we landed, stood on the ever going prepaid queue, cursed cab drivers for finding innovative reasons for not coming and cherry on the cake, gorom! 

What you see on the face? Is it sweat? It is oil? Who can tell. S looked like he'll faint any moment, even if you cut my exaggeration, he looked quite unwell, add the semi sick he has been for the looong week we had. 

Worry

More worry

Even more frustration

Puffs of dust miked wind straight into our eyes,

A little peak from the mask to smell it all.

A little spray too!

Kalboishakhi!

Hello Kollolini

:')

Now, if the fate gods behave, might as well get a taxi after 1.5hrs of wait. Who can tell!

Homesick Again!

 

My love for Kolkata does a dramatic reminder entry on a summer evening while cherry blossom cover every corner of Bangalore, kids of the society do a cheerful play in the pool, office is about to get over earlier than usual. Everything happy, everything peaceful?

Yet I wonder how the smell of Summer is from the terrace beside my room this year? 

Did Tribe introduce a new pork platter on their menu?

Has the city had its first shower of the year already without me?

Is JU having fests again?

Kalibari grounds all set with Poila Boishakh mela?

It takes immense amount of purbo jonmer punno to live and die in Kolkata, I know!

Live?

Die?

Maybe?

Not?

Take me home already!

Up Up And Away

Fears

Tears

Wants

Needs

Truths

Lies

Life

Time

Up

Up

Away

Hindustan Ka Dil Dekho 🧡🤍💚

For a very long time in my life, Mamabari = Dadurbari = Madhya Pradesh ; was something I would tell my friends with utter pride when I was complimented for my non Bangla accented Hindi (yes that is a cool Bangla thing)

Then of course Madhya Pradesh got divided into Chhattisgarh and Madhya Pradesh, Dongargarh was sold off, Dida took off, Dadu followed, things got bitter, however; visiting Madhya Pradesh after so many years filled my heart!

Bias aside, WHAT A CLEAN STATE!

With Bias, WHAT A PRETTY STATE!

Leaving Kolkata is never easy.

Never has been.

Never would be.

Kolkata Spring

Kolkata Spring has a charm of its own!

While the winter fearing clan gets way too excited about shedding off multilayers, it also is the time for exams nearing by!

Kolkata Spring always reminds me of the impending 'School er final porikkha' (we are an old generation of April to March sessions) or college's even semesters!

The rush of wind smelling of newly opened books, the clothes fluttering in the wind singing its own lullaby, slow setting sun and an urge to go out for a cycle ride or adda by the 'parar pukur'.

With Saraswati Pujo just around the corner, my heart is so full to experience Kolkata Springs, after very many years! 

How (much) are you enjoying your Spring this year?!

Happy poem on unhappy day

Keep that smile

Do what they say

Happy poem on unhappy day

Life is grey

Write away

Happy poem on unhappy day

- Abhishikta

Dawn

Dawn, they named her.

The end to darkness,

The lighy of hope,

Dawn, 

A least acknowledged, vanishing smile

Did you know that dawn lasts just for a while?

Pufff, and it fizzes

Into Eternal Sunshine.

The world looks in wonder,

The world stands at praise,

But,

Pufff, and it fizzes

Into Eternal Sunshine.

Dawn,

The temporary existence,

The peaceful silence.

Dawn, they named her

Dawn,

A tear down a face that otherwise shines.

- Abhishikta

Mandate

1. What did you do in 2021 that you’ve never done before?
Married

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions and will you make more for next year?
2021 resolution to panic less, not kept, not met.
2022, reduce the smoke!

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Yes, Prajakta gave us Arjun! :')

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Dadu
Mesho
Mrs. Ghatak

 

5. What countries did you visit?
Bleh!
But I did visit Bangalore, Kolkata, Darjeeling, Dhotrey, Goa, Chandigarh, Mcleodganj, Ludhiana, Kumbakonam.


6. What would you like to have in 2022 that you lacked in 2021?
Fearlessness


7. What date from 2020 will remain etched upon your memory?
26th April! My Engagement amidst the HUGE second Covid wave.


8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
CSM!
Switch.


9. What was your biggest failure?
Putting my parents through a lot!


10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Dengue! TOO MUCH of it!


11. What was the best thing you bought?
TV


12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Baba's


13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Prajapati Senior


14. Where did most of your money go?
Tickets


15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Goa!
Wedding oath!


16. What song/album will always remind you of 2021?
Sang Rahiyo :')


17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
1. Happier or sadder? Same
2. Thinner or fatter? Fatter
3. Richer or poorer? Richer (This considering we're still at TTMM)


18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Working out!


19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Worrying


20. How did you spend Christmas?
Shouted my lungs out at 83 at the theatre at the stroke of midnight
Drank cheap wine


21. Who did you spend most of the time on the phone with?
S! Again! Hello Long Distance


22. Did you fall in love in 2021?
Yes


23. How many one night stands in this last year?
None.


24. What was your favorite Tv programme?
Grey's Anatomy
Emily in Paris
Good Doctor (briefly)
Little Things (Last Season :'))

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
Yes and No. Hate is too strong a word maybe. Dislike, that is the word.


26. What was the best book(s) you read?
Again a year of absolutely zero reads. Shameful. Yes.


27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Haman Hai Ishq Mastana


28. What did you want and get?
All major festivals at home :')


29. What did you want and did not get?
Visiting Northern Lights for Honeymoon


30. What were your favorite films?
Can't think of even 1 right now


31. What did you do on your birthday and how old were you?
30+ :)
I was home
S flew down to home
We visited by lanes of Gafra and Esplanade
Beer flowed
Maa cooked
It was perfect! :')

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Less Covid scare


33. What would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2020?
Handeddown Tshirts!


34. What kept you sane?
Maa


35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Kavya


36. What political issue stirred you the most?
Narendra Modi (figure)


37. Who did you miss?
Dida


38. Who was the best new person you met?
Noone

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2021?
Save Well!


40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year?

एक दिन आप यूं हमको मिल जाएंगे फूल ही फूल राहों में खिल जाएंगे मैंने सोचा न था

Peace, Love, Health

Little New Year Prayer!

Somewhere between 11:59 and 12:01

2022, Please be kind!

Wedding Ring Tattoo, Check

 

True Love Who! ❤️

It's been so long that we've not been speaking! On stage.

Not sure about others, but I could definitely feel the change in confidence and comfort on stage, two years later, not in the most positive way. Long way from here. Very long way from here.

Start again!

Learn again!

Speak again!

❤️

May I Go To Toilet

Wasn't it just yesterday when you would slowly raise your hand up, pull your small wooden chair, adjust your skirt and say "Miss, may I go to toilet?". 

I was thinking off late, why? Why did we ever ask permission for something so basic and what would be the outcome when the alleged 'Miss' would say NO to our toilet request? Why are we conditioned from childhood to request for our basic rights? Of course we grow up, study well, score better than everyone, earn, work more than everyone but at the end, the conditioned upbringing, the conditioned mindset!? Of asking if we should eat, sleep, walk, jump, breathe, go to toilet!

Does it ever leave us? If it ever does, is the world conditioned to accept it? Does anyone's acceptance really matter? Think! Reflect! 

Here's hoping we never have to ask anyone before going to toilet ever again. Amen.

The Bollywood I Wanted :')

 

Call it Magic! ♥️

Found the perfect Hermione to my Ron 🦋

Biye Bollywood that I had always wanted

*Thu Thu Thu*

Priority Prayer for Girls!

While I'm seeing an increase in the number of Jagadhattri pujos this year (or maybe I've been out of Calcutta for way too long), I hope the Bearer Goddess bears girl child in families where they can teach her to have a voice in this world. 

Let's start from that. My prayer lists are anyhow, always, endless.

Amen.

Photos and Memories

Photographs

The importance or no importance if it in a world full of influencers and people wanting to document their lives.

A few weeks ago I visited one of my uncle's house where I saw this huge black and white album of old photos where my Pishis looked young and Amma looked like Bouma. Photos of few relatives who are no more, photos of me smiling wide and bald, my sister in objectionable clothes for a 20+ today but perfect for the 2 year old in photo. I was thinking if there were 300 variants of the same photo to choose from, if we would be happier, or just indifferent because, choices and backups.

Then there was this human I knew very close for almost 4 years of college and a year more but I have zero photos with. This is about a time when photos were a norm but sie was always too ashamed (embarrassed?). Ofcourse this human chose to leave. Hindsight I realise it is a good thing, for the lack of photos mean fading memory for me and my generation, mostly.

Then there was this human who would take a million screenshots, probably because sie wasn't as ashamed (embarrassed?). Good thing? Commits for a lifetime of bold memories since I intend to not lose this human? Who are we to ascertain! Petty humans.

But good memories are to be remembered even without photos. My uncle's generation would agree. But the shallow heart wonders, really??? 

Happy Birthday SRK

Happy Birthday SRK! The God of love!

I have been inquisitive about love of all forms and types, ages and phases, much before I even knew what love is. We hardly know what it is today as well, me, you, everyone, everywhere.

Off late I have been wondering of the fear of losing someone as the most potent form of love. Death, breakup, conspiracy, duty, condition, its-not-you-its-me, the reasons are many, many! But the same baseline, fear. And you do, all that you do, to not be afraid. A day old in love or a hundred years, matters very little.

Fear in love means less love or more!? Ever wondered!? To love someone so much that you're afraid to lose them? To be loved so little that you're afraid to lose them? A? B? Both? None? We get to choose? You have a say? You end up being the selfish one anyway, to love, maybe yourself a little as well this time? But then you were supposed to bear and hear. Who changed the game rules?

I guess we will never know what love is. Till then, Fear over Love or Love over Fear? Choose your pick! :)

And it's okay maybe if you're not the Kavya to Dhruv.

To Love... AMEN ❤️