Edu Kondala Vada, VenkatRamana, Govinda Goooovinda

Tirupathi

A place that I had planned to never ever visit because

A. I am not much of a teerth yatra fan

B. It is rather tough place to go to.

 

However, as they say, when the God calls you, you go and we went. It would be really unfair to say that it was not planned and everything “happened”. There were plans, and re-plans, and schedule matching, and re-plans, and weekend office spoiling, and re-plans, and cold wars, and re-plans, and A’s onshore clashing, and re-plans, and finally on one Saturday afternoon, when we were supposed to work, we left office at 3.

Now to especially mention the fact that it was last weekend when we were cashless and Bangalore ATMs were sights to see and Tirupathi locals told us, no money anywhere around. Money we had, 500-ish. We left Bangalore anyway. Thank God that Government had exempted the toll for this time period, little thoughtfulness. I do not know how many of you know but the Bangalore-Kolar highway is pretty and the mine areas look pretty filmy. People staying in Bangalore for quite some time, must be aware of the fact that nobody actually looks at the cars while crossing the road, we just cross (and the cars WOULD stop). So we met this woman near the Kolar Gold mine highway who was quite in the hang of this Bangalore road crossing practice and our 100km/hr car almost killed her. Quite a heart stopping experience, that.

We of course reached Tirupathi waaaaay later than expected, blame it on too much Antakshari and too much work and too much distraction. When we (when I say we, it is everyone but me (no specs till here)) finally saw the Tirumala hills with shankha-chakra-tika bright lights, it looked like not too much of a challenge for the night. Lots of discussions, pros and cons of trekking on a Kartik-Chaturthi night, the possibilities of dacoits and wild animals later, we started off with the last bit of change left, in an auto to the Tirumala hills footstop, 12:30 in the night.

Tips for whoever wants to visit: To reach the main temple, you will have to reach the Tirumala hills first. There are 3 ways to reach the Tirumala hills:

1. There are fully functional bus services from Tirupathi to Tirumala, 24*7. There are private and Government buses, you can also take your car. This will take is somewhere around 45-60 minutes.

2. There is a stepway trek from Alipiri. This step trek is roughly of 9kms, of which there are 3550 stairs and rest are almost flat roads. Normally people take 4-5 hours through this route to reach Tirumala. This is open 24*7 and no matter when you start, you will always get to see fellow devotees/ trekkers. We took this one.

3. There another trekway from Srivari Mettu. This opens at 6am in the morning. As per our hotel person, this route is ‘safer’ and it takes only 2.5 hours. We did not take this one but somehow, most of the people at Tirupathi would tell you to take this one.

And we started our journey from the Alipiri. There was a full crowded market right at the stairway where the steps start. N wanted to climb up without chappal and so she did.

Tips for whoever wants to visit: The Tirumala is on the seven hills. These seven hills are considered religious by the people so mostly people walk barefoot. It is completely alright if you want to wear your shoes/chappal and trek up. You may get a few dirty looks from Aunties and Uncles but you will find many people walking with shoes.

As per the official website and other sites, it is a compulsion for women to wear salwar or saari. And mind you girls, when they say salwar, they want to highlight on the dupatta. Although I did not face any disturbance, but when S visited the same place, she HAD to buy dupatta because she went ahead with Kurti.  No matter how much arguments we have, this one rule is unbendable apparently. The clothes criteria will come only after you reach the Tirumala hills so during the trek, wear whatever you want. The boys can wear whatever they want (I know, unfair).

Make sure you carry enough water or cash or at least your bottles. There would be many many water stations and washrooms and small shops on the way as well. When you start your step, there would be a big fire lamp in the middle, which is for keeping away nazar, do NOT look back at it from the steps (yeah I’m superstitious).

And thus our trek was on. After the initial jing and jang of looking at old sculptures and people and everything else, there were steep and unending stairs straight. Very excitedly I turned back at the 300^th step and made everyone turn back and look at the pretty city lights from up. THAT made N dizzy, she did not tell me, knowing me. A knew, and thus started the rest of the trek where I was wondering why on earth is A not letting N walk for more than 50 steps, on one go. Somewhere around the 700^th step, N’s haal was behaal. A ran to this water stall and call it God’d grace, he got his Rs.500 note exchanged for bottles of water and Glucon-D. This change was all that we had now. Panting and resting every now and then we finally reached the point of the shankha-chakra-tilak on the hill. It was the 2082nd step and we thought woah, here it ends.

It turned out to be the Biometric halt and not even half of what we had to cover. There were 6 kms more to go. This probably  was when I felt for the first time that I would not be able to make it.

Tips for whoever wants to visit: You may not be able to locate the biometric counter, it is to the left, where the amphitheatre (type) ends. This place is a mini-mela and you will find a lot of food options (South-Indian mostly). This is only half of what you’ve climbed but the road ahead would be simpler, but distance would be longer.

For us, there was a little excitement in counting the steps, no matter however steep and rigorous it was. After the biometric, you need to walk straight and then 2 steps, and then straaaaaight and again two steps. So even after walking for 15 minutes, you may end up finding that you have covered only 20 steps. I had a great time scaring N who clearly thought some wild animal will eat us up (remember how the localites warned us about animals on the way?).

Tips for whoever wants to visit: You will find a small deer park on the way, If you are travelling at night, or day for that matter, leave the poor animals alone. Your torch lights and selfie drama clearly makes them VERY uncomfortable. If your find a random animal on the sidewise treeline, do not irritate it or shout. They will not harm you. If anyone tries to scare you about dacoits, don’t panic. Other than small pickpocket incidents, Tirupathi trek is a safe business. There is some temple  on the Jungle pathway and I did not try it. Go at your own risk if you want to.

We also found this animal en route, which someone said was Nilgai. I doubt my animal skills, that too without specs. Since there are seven hills that one has to cross before reaching Tirumala, a point will come where you will actually walk on the same road as the buses. I had this immense wish of stopping a bus and going but then, batmanhood.

This last stretch is about 4km straight and a little steep. I was obviously thinking that at the end of this is our destination. It had become around 5-ish by then and 5 hours we estimated, The Glucon-D had done its wonders to all and I had almost started regretting not having it. At the end of the interconnected hill road, we saw, 600 more steps, steep ones. And suddenly, everyone started to get up on their knees.

I sat down and thought of giving up. N and A forced me Glocon-D sips. 10mins rest, Glucon-D and pep talks later, me and A started trying the knee step stunt and gave up after 10 steps. Somehow we finished the 600 last steps and wohooo, Tirumala ahoy! 6:30am.

Tips for whoever wants to visit: From Tirumala to the temple is a different journey again. Most buses will leave you at Tirumala near the temple. Please ask the local shop people and keep your belongings in the locker room. However they allow wallets so carry money for the hundi if you want to. Only one ID card is enough to get lockers. Once you reach the temple, they will make you take the laddoo token (except for free darshan where they get the token inside the cage), there are three line varieties:

1. For free darshan: You need to follow the queue. On weekends and holidays, do yourself a favour and do not go for free darshan. They will make you walk and walk and walk and wait till you finally reach the cage. However, the cage will be overpopulated and all will sit on the ground and sleep on top of each other while waiting.   

2. For special darshan: You need to pay an amount of Rs.350 per person online and get your special darshan tickets. The queue to the cage will be smaller and the cage will have chairs.

3. For divya darshan: You need to trek till Tirumala and the queue will be smaller than free darshan and longer than special darshan. You will get into the same cage as free darshan.

The cages are numbered from 1-30. I do not know how much of this is true but the free darshan and divya darshan cages open once around 10:45am mostly, so try getting into the cage before this time. Next slot cage opening may take a lot of time. This cage is basically the waiting room where they will serve you breakfast/food/tea/coffee for free. Washroom, fan and drinking water is present throughout. However, people with claustrophobia, try and avoid.

After getting inside the cage number 28 at around 7am, the crowd slowly slowing increased till a point where you will actually sleep on top of random unknown people because you are too tired. We did not even wake up for Pongal or coffee. Around 10:45 the cage opened. People from all the darshan varieties merge at this time and no matter what trick you follow, you will be pushed and pulled.

Tips for whoever wants to visit:  Please don’t push or pull or fight. You will have a LOT of weird, cheap, nice, polite, rude, pokey, loud people around. Bear or not, don’t push or pull. I do not know how much of this is true but Govinda should be seen from toe to head and then you should do your prayers looking at his eyes. You will not get more than 2 seconds before they throw you out (literally) so be quick.

We finally had our darshan at around 12 after a LOT of lines. The 2 seconds seemed surreal. I, of course could not identify Govinda’s eyes and thus, yet again, my wishes went unheard. I was glad at least N and A saw him in the eyes and prayed for whatever they wanted. Next would be first line to some other God place where the Pujari may force you to give money but don’t if you don’t want to. I didn’t. Then would be the Hundi line where the popular belief says, the more you give the more you get. If you know about the Shree Chakra then do that as well. We were almost killed while coming back due to some path blockage.

 Tips for whoever wants to visit: Please do not carry babies. Decide on a common meeting place if you lose each other because 80% people do.

End of gate they give Prasad and after so much, the curd rice that I have forever disliked also seemed exotic. Finally you get you go to the laddoo counter, show your coupon and get the ever so famous Tirupathi laddoos. While coming back we took the bus back to Tirupathi from Tirumala. You can trek back. We reached Tirumala by 4pm and finally found a card accepting restaurant. Yay!

Tips for whoever wants to visit: The people and vendors and everyone can be very very rude. There is very little point in going into an argument but then, if you’re me, you WILL fight. I hope you have someone to peace the situation out.

Coming back was tough. There was Aji who had not slept for more than 40 hours and had to drive, we had trouble walking and he was planning to drive in that. Men are men and thus we started off. My job was to shit talk and keep him awake. It was around 10 in the night when he suddenly stopped the car on the highway footpath and just dozed off, that was when I got scared. After that, and before that, for that matter, I kept on looking at his eyes, red sleepy tired eyes. Phew. The tolls were free again and in that trance, he did not even stop to check. N thought we would die. In my half closed eyes I kept on talking, this time nonsense. At about 1am we reached Marathalli. Finally. And then a lot of drama followed but then what is life without drama.

And to do all of this at the time of no cash, pat pat pat.

So again, as they always said,
Edu Kondala Vada, VenkatRamana, Govinda Goooovinda