Tufaan Toofaaaaaaan

Living alone in a flat (for a while for now)
Check

Refuge from social media and society (for a while for now)
Check

This
Check

Photographs

Let me start with a photograph straight out of an epic feminist movie cover.  The roommate can do wonders when she wants, really.

No wonder why I love this photograph. 

Photographs. 

Normal photographs that you've clicked last year,  last month,  few years ago ,  few months ago, yesterday,  today.

Basic, candid or ugly ones.

What happens when you categorise your photographs and have only two categories on mind.

1. Still looks hopeful with life
2. Does not

Or

1. Still smiling genuinely
2. Is not

Photographs.
You realise the power,  the magic that they are.
They damage that they can do.
Like people.

Beef Anyone?

Just the other day
When everyone on the table were in high brows when I ordered beef,
Just the other day;
Just everyday;
Just everyday!
I miss.

-Abhishikta

Breathe

Hard life lesson ;

The following weeks of denial
The following months of crying
The following years of shut down.

Cycled
Recycled
Seasoned
Served

Harder life lessons ;

Thought life cannot hurt more,
Wish, was right that time

Think life will hurt more,

Wish, am wrong this time.

In the mean time,
Breathe.

- Abhishikta

Fret Not

Fret Not.
Fret not my heart.
For there always is
A forever, after glitch.
A light, that guides.
A solvable closure, to departs.

Haven’t they always taught you right?
How the storms always lead to calm.
How the sun makes a Golden start.
Everytime!
Everyday!
But maybe, not today.
For the clouds laugh, from miles apart.
But, keep chanting.
Over and over again.

Fret Not!
Fret Not,
Oh Dear, Abandoned Heart.

-Abhishikta

Mandate. The Year of Tears, 2018. 2019, I'm too Tired To Even Beg for Good

1. What did you do in 2018 that you’ve never done before?
Travelled alone across continent
Bought my own diamond
Begged before a certain someone
Had brilliant champagne for free with random Polish politicians
Set up home out of nothing
Cried without feeling ashamed

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions and will you make more for next year?
Nothing made last year.
This year I would want to be fit, mentally.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
No

4. Did anyone close to you die?
In my heart, 

5. What countries did you visit?
Ah, after all these years, yay!
Poland
Netherlands
Finland
In India, Pune, Kolkata, Bilaspur, Raipur, Dongargarh,  Kolkata,  Delhi,  Jammu and Kashmir,  Hyderabad,  Kolkata,  Hyderabad, Kolkata, Chikmagalure,  Mumbai, Matheran,  Kolkata,  Pune, Satara, Hyderabad
Mad travel year?  I know!
Bankrupt. 

6. What would you like to have in 2019 that you lacked in 2018?
Love

7. What date from 2018 will remain etched upon your memory?
15.04.2018

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Bearing the last one month
Switching to a different domain

9. What was your biggest failure?
Relationship

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Consistent left eye issues

Level 2 depression

11. What was the best thing you bought?
Diamond for me!

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Smita, Narmada, Aritri

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Oh good lord, don't even.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Love.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Onsite
Relationship
Pujo

16. What song/album will always remind you of 2018?
Dil Beparvah

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
1. Happier or sadder? Sadder, a million times sadder
2. Thinner or fatter? Same
3. Richer or poorer? Richer

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Judging

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Loving

20. How did you spend Christmas?
Woke up to the oldest of friends, had very good food and brilliant conversation with a bunch of babies, who still have a lot of hope left.
Also decorated the new house and had immense amount of chocolates beside the Christmas tree, all by myself, and, read the Bible.

21. Who did you spend most of the time on the phone with?
Maa and someone I trusted a lot.

22. Did you fall in love in 2018?
Yes.

23. How many one night stands in this last year?
:/

24. What was your favorite Tv programme?
Series count these days okay?
Yeh meri family
Little things
Mirzapur

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
YES
2 + myself

26. What was the best book(s) you read?
No book read

L

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Baarishein

28. What did you want and get?
Switch

29. What did you want and did not get?
Commitment that stays.

30. What were your favorite films?
I cannot remember a single movie I watched right now

31. What did you do on your birthday and how old were you?
Got very worked up on the age.

And went home of course!

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
People not abandoning.

33. What would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2018?
House clothes over other clothes

34. What kept you sane?
What kept me sane has pushed me to a terrible insanity. So, does not count really.

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Ranveeeeeeeeeeeeeer Singh!

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
Assam on the Bangladesh refugee count

37. Who did you miss?
Dida

38. Who was the best new person you met?
NO ONE

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2018?
Money cannot buy us happiness

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year?
वो जो कहते थे बिछड़ेंगे ना हम कभी
अलविदा हो गए देखते देखतेl