Sulking No 10001

Just when you are in deep deep introspection (or self pity should I call), the rain arrives, making you leave Java and go through all those prized screenshots which would probably stay with you forever (with extended backups) because... well because. You also do your random stalking of random happy people (when I say people, I specifically mean plural, the number is very specific, two).

Did they teach you in high school or middle school or Montessori that jealousy falls under bad virtue? I have become a very bad person this year. Do not confuse between jealous and insecure. I am very specifically a very jealous person for a very specific field of human emotion which I see all around and suddenly more vividly, while I stare at random Subways and Swirls with not so glittery eyes.

Earthquakes came. While on day1 I was bed-shaking and wondering if the earth is shaking or safe far south, on day2, at the Mani Square washroom when they started evacuating people with such urgency and seriousness, I did feel scared to die, after a very very long time. It was one of those moments when I understood that the one I secretly am disappointed with, was not wrong in choosing what was chosen over the whole of me. Self happiness comes FIRST, for everyone. The after effects and the after shocks cause way too many quakes this way though. However.

Then there is this beautiful song and my darling Sonu Nigam is BACK. Had it been college time, I am sure Sir would have made this the x semester special song. As for me, I would play it on loop till I get absolutely disgusted with it. Anyway, SUCH a beautiful song. I would ignore the lyrics for now. Try to atleast. Java time again, maybe not. There is a consistent (thank God for one consistency in my life) Kalbaishakhi, so time to feel all heroine like again. The movie genre is still a matter of discussion for tomorrow. Well.