Whenever the doctor said "take the medicines/ ei oshudh ta neben", I would always wonder why won't they mention "have/khaben". Especially in Bengal, where we eat everything, why this discrimination with medicines???
Then came 2025, continuing in 2026, where when the Doctor says "take the medicines" you have to know if she's talking about having it, inserting it, injecting it or applying it, and ll 4 happens parallelly, regularly.
Hence.
Yikes
In school they really thought I'd do something big
In college I really thought I'd do something big
Look at me now? Praying everyday for bare minium professional excellence and still struggling. That guy with his stoned existence and yellow hair who would sit behind me for all of the 8 semesters and constantly copy, is cruising though his new car at Amsterdam (not making that up and not doubting his non academic excellence). Guess academics are not as important as we had been taught. Maybe, what they thought and I thought; all wrong. Maybe, I had built a bubble so big that it took all these years to burst and now, what I see is world as it is. Where I, am a speck of dust. And a burden to all those around me with my constant bickering and complaining. Should I eat veg? Should I stop ordering? Should I just disappear?
Multiple bags of chips and rerun of Grey's Anatomy but where is the peace? The rains came for a bit for/with me but then there was the sun. Then there was light. If Gods have to be so literal it needs to be figurative as well. Happiness needs to happen for real too. And soon. Before I lose it all. And I am very close.
